My Worst 10 Films of The Decade - Part #2

Very little introduction needed then. These were my own personal worst five viewing experiences of the noughties.

5 - Jumper (2008)



Rotten Tomatoes Rating: 16% (Rotten)
IMDb Average: 5.9







I seem to remember Jumper managing to build a fairly decent level of anticipation when its release date swung round. Hayden Christensen got the girls interested, Rachel Bilson the lads and, fingers crossed, it had the solid acting talents of Samuel L. and Jamie Bell to give it a bit of meat in the middle. In the end though, it turned out to be a derivative genre mess. Rightly or wrongly, Christensen took a lot of the flak but really, Bell was just as awful, Jackson was only there for a paycheck and Bilson hasn't starred in another major film since. Rightly pilloried in most places, Jumper didn't even make it off the ground.


4 - Adaptation (2002)



Rotten Tomatoes Rating: 91% (Fresh)
IMDb Average: 7.9





Adaptation is pretty much universally liked amongst critics but search hard enough and you'll find some dissenting voices; 'puts cleverness at the expense of everything else' writes one, 'the most overrated movie of the year (of all time?) by people who should know better' shouts another. The criticism levelled at these people is typically that they didn't 'get' Adaptation, that it was too 'deep', too inaccessible for the masses. I'll admit to feeling all of those things towards the film but the reason I really disliked Adaptation is its level of self-involved, film student smugness, played out during two hours where it never forgets how Important it is. I typically have a natural scepticism towards films about film making, or plays about play writing or (God save me) songs about singing and the fact that critics have started to spot this arc in Kauffman's writing will hopefully start to reveal how 'original' he really is.


3 - The Gift (2000)



Rotten Tomatoes Rating: 56% (Rotten)
IMDb Average: 6.7





Just awful. A horror film with no horror. A drama with no drama. A film with no plot. The pacing, direction and narrative were all over the place and it gave the distinct feeling that it wasn't even committed to its own ideas (something which you can at least, not level at Kauffman). Literally found myself falling asleep.


2 - Somersault (2004)



Rotten Tomatoes Rating: 83% (Fresh)
IMDb Average: 6.8





If a film describes itself as a having something to do with a 'journey of discovery' then it's going to have to be pretty damn good. This isn't. Abbie Cornish's character wanders around, hopping from bed-to-bed apparently learning something meaningful along the way which we are meant to recognise because Director Cate Shortland inserts a lot of 'artsy' shots of bleak Australian countryside. Apparently, Cornish's character learns the difference between 'sex and love' during it's run time whilst I learnt the difference between a good film and one that wants to win awards. Unconvincing and splattered with annoying characters this couldn't of meant any less to me or said anything less about teenage disenfranchisement and sexuality. The at-the-time raved about Shortland hasn't directed another feature film since.



1 - The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen (2003)




Rotten Tomatoes Rating: 16% (Rotten)
IMDb Average: 5.5






Not just the worst film I've watched which was made in this decade but the worst film I have ever sat through. It remains the only film that I have turned off after about an hour, a decision which I ultimately regretted because I had to sit through that first hour again when I decided to see what it really was like. On-set squabbles can account for some of the mess created here but not all of it. The setting and overall theme comes across as a bit twee, especially for a comic-book film, and the 'heroes' feel more like carnival side-shows. Almost nothing exciting happens and Sean Connery obviously gave up trying to hold together the miss-cast 'stars' somewhere towards the middle of the shoot. No defining purpose, no sense of direction, woeful pacing and an awful script conspired to make this my worst film of the decade.


Look Further...

There are plenty of 'Best Of...' lists doing the rounds at the moment, far too many to mention in fact, but for those looking for a 'catch all' guide you could head over to Movie Moxie who is compiling a 'List of Lists' from contributing bloggers.

Elsewhere, some time has also been put into thinking about 'Worst Of...' lists, Rotten Tomatoes countdown of the 100 worst is a nice layout and acts as a useful catalogue for running through the 'Epic/Date/Superhero Movie' genre. Movifone also ran a Top 40 list with their picks although I'm unsure whether this is user's or personal choice. Acts as a good document for films of noted low regard like Gigli and Battlefield Earth

4 comments:

  1. I've seen two of the five again, bringing me to four of your total ten.

    I'm still trying to get the taste of THE GIFT out of my mouth, I chalk that one up to an ex-gf as well (a different one from that responsible for BLAIR WITCH 2 though).

    I must disagree with ADAPTATION though...not only did I not hate it (far from it actually), I considered it one of the best of that year. Whatchagonnado though - Kauffman ain't for everybody.

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  2. I'm with Hatter on this one, Adaptation was freakin' fantastic. But alas, different strokes for different folks. Diggin the site, btw. Keep it up.

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  3. I would say that Kauffman's divisive but it is true that I come across more people who like him than don't. Personally, I'm not sold and I'm not sure I ever will be, certainly not in regard to Adaptation, but kudos to you if you managed to get something out of it.

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  4. I totally agree with you on ADAPTATION (one of the few movies during which I fell asleep), but I must say I liked THE LEAGUE OF EXTRAORDINARY GENTLEMAN, probably because I didn't expect much from it, just fun and beautiful visuals.

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